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Important
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GimpMask
My daddy ate my eyes.
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 15034
(Sat Mar 17, 2012 12:05 pm)
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Post     Important

Bear Grylls has been fucking fired. Over a contract dispute.

Couldn't he have gone out by like fighting a polar bear to the death?
GimpMask
My daddy ate my eyes.
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 15034
(Sat Mar 17, 2012 12:53 pm)
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Post     Re: Important

I cannot link the report but it described his job description as"forced to bite heads off if snakes wrap his head in a urine soaked shirt and drink his own urine to survive after being dropped into a dangerous wilderness"
Theldorrin
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 19724
(Sat Mar 17, 2012 3:12 pm)
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Post     Re: Important

I finally saw Bear Grylls on TV a year or so ago, and didn't realize he was a very pretty man and a Brit.

For some reason I had always gotten the impression that he was some sort of brutish fellow, and not someone that pranced about in the fields.
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GimpMask
My daddy ate my eyes.
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 15034
(Sat Mar 17, 2012 3:23 pm)
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Post     Re: Important

He is a brute with a heart of gold. He's a super Guy, it just so happens that he is the closest thing to a totally unrealistically raoh-like manga character who happens to be real.
GimpMask
My daddy ate my eyes.
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 15034
(Sat Mar 17, 2012 3:26 pm)
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Post     Re: Important

And he is an extremely good-looking man. His existence makes little sense.
Theldorrin
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 19724
(Sat Mar 17, 2012 9:16 pm)
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Post     Re: Important

He's more like some bishonen character from yaoi than Raoh.

Or maybe Ranma?
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GimpMask
My daddy ate my eyes.
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 15034
(Sat Mar 17, 2012 9:34 pm)
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Post     Re: Important

*OOF*

Impossible...

OBJECTION!

This British SAS French legioning holds world record for highest recorded height into atmosphere and hydrates himself with elephant shit and broke his back repeatedly with his freedall entrances is not. Priapic to the limit? Calling your logic faulty us incorrect...it simply does not exist!
Theldorrin
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 19724
(Sat Mar 17, 2012 11:42 pm)
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Post     Re: Important



QED
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GimpMask
My daddy ate my eyes.
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 15034
(Sun Mar 18, 2012 6:31 am)
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Post     Re: Important

Try posting a picture of him insanely leaping into Arctic water than doing push ups naked. Climbing a glacier with a Flint and then devouring a freshly killed animal looking like he just vamped that period style pussy
GimpMask
My daddy ate my eyes.
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 15034
(Sun Mar 18, 2012 10:33 am)
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Post     Re: Important

His personality is so likable. You just wanna make him a pi tire construction Ted of hard noodles that forms a heart, but looking at his body of work you become fearful he he urinates on his clothes to keep warm and that he may snap your femur in half to suck out the bone marrow.
Theldorrin
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 19724
(Sun Mar 18, 2012 10:38 am)
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Post     Re: Important

It sounds like you're confusing him with someone that isn't a phoney, like Les Stroud.
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GimpMask
My daddy ate my eyes.
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 15034
(Sun Mar 18, 2012 10:46 am)
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Post     Re: Important

YOU MOTHER FUCKER SHUT YOUR FUCKING HERESY RIDDEN MOUTH

LES STROUD IS A DUMB FAGGOT WHO SITS UNDER A BUNDLE OF STICKS PLAYING A HARMONI A PISSING HIMSELF OUT OF FEAR

BEAR IS NOT ASKED TO SURVIVE HES ASJED TO BE GOKU AND SAFETLY EXIT AN ENVIRONMENT THAT WOULD KILL A SULF SUFFUCIENT WILD MAN WITHIN 12 HOURS. OF COURSE A MEDUCAL TEAM IS THERE JUAT IN CASE HIS INSANE DESCENT DOWN A TWO HUNDRED FOOT HIGH WATERFALL ENDS IN DISASTER

Basically he's asked to perform insane stunts while getting out of a dangerous locale

Stroud sits around bundled up for five days till his friend gets him via GPS
Theldorrin
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 19724
(Sun Mar 18, 2012 11:08 am)
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Post     Re: Important

Bear Grylls loves mincing about in hot vacation spots and creating television episodes about it.
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Theldorrin
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 19724
(Sun Mar 18, 2012 11:09 am)
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Post     Re: Important

"A scene where Grylls was purported to have escaped from an active volcano by leaping across lava, avoiding poisonous sulphur dioxide gas, was actually enhanced with special effects, using hot coal and smoke machines."
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Theldorrin
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 19724
(Sun Mar 18, 2012 11:10 am)
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Post     Re: Important

"Similarly, another episode gave viewers the impression that Grylls "was a 'real life Robinson Crusoe' stuck on a desert island", while in reality he was on an outlying part of the Hawaiian archipelago and retired to a motel at night."
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GimpMask
My daddy ate my eyes.
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 15034
(Sun Mar 18, 2012 11:19 am)
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Post     Re: Important

Besides those being filthy lies, how can you fake climbing down a massive jagged canyon and proceeding to eat a dead sheep's eye? OK, maybe he almost vomited it up, but even if that was true no freaking way they can just fake the true insanity of his predictaments.
Theldorrin
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 19724
(Sun Mar 18, 2012 11:54 am)
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Post     Re: Important

No, the things you believe are the lies.

Here's an example.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BBmhNA7JME4
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GimpMask
My daddy ate my eyes.
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 15034
(Sun Mar 18, 2012 12:18 pm)
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Post     Re: Important

Do you really think they'd let the cat out of the bag so flagrantly? How about you provide a link to him doing something so utterly insane and ridiculous its like what the he'll?
Seru
Custom titles are for heroes, like me.
Joined: 08 Jan 2007
Posts: 11012
(Sun Mar 18, 2012 4:49 pm)
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Post     Re: Important

Les Stroud is pretty great. Looks like that social capital just took another hit.
GimpMask
My daddy ate my eyes.
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 15034
(Sun Mar 18, 2012 5:27 pm)
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Post     Re: Important

Whoa there, he's the survivorman, correct? Is he Canadian? Cause that's the only explanation about how MY social capital took a hit. Even if he is, and I never thought id disagree with you CLINT, but if you prefer stroud over bear, it'd be the other way around.

How broke am I anyway?
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