Dragon Ball Z Uncensored

Vinny · (Fri Jan 19, 2007 9:35 pm)

Welcome to FTUW, the PREMIERE Internet wrestling league! Now that we are entering PHASE 2, these are all the things you need to know in order to get started!

First off, FTUW revolves around its Pay-Per-Views that occur once a month. In these, our contracted wrestlers (and sometimes faceless jobbers) battle it the fuck out in all kinds of incredible matches. The FTUW Booking Team scripts all matches between player characters, taking into account all heat that opponents have accumulated for one another in the build-up to the show.

To generate heat, players will be encouraged to write their own promos and non-storyline altering segments, particularly those of which directly target their latest opponents. To avoid BULLSHITTERY and subsequent explosions of those affected by said bullshittery, you may only post a maxium of FIVE promos per day. You may only post as many promos as there are days between PPVs. Usually, this means 30 or 31 promos (unless it's February!) including the day of the actual previous PPV. On the day of the PPV you are promo'ing for, any promos posted on that day will not count for that PPV. The deadline for promos for a PPV is 3 A.M. EST of the day of the Pay-Per-View.

As for segments such as backstage ambushes and the killing of opponents' family members, those that affect the storyline, players must contact a member of the FTUW Booking Team on AIM, email, private message or simply posting their request publicly (but that could ruin the surprise!). The request will be reviewed and then written BY the team itself if it's decided upon.

On the day of Pay Per Views, matches and other occurrences will be posted by the booking team, one by one. There will be no favoritism and three determining factors will decide the outcome of the matches:

1) Quality: The most important one. The person who promos the best will typically win, however ...

2) Storyline: This is also a factor. We will do whatever creates a more compelling storyline if the two (or more) competitor's PROMO QUALITY is relatively close.

3) Quantity: When all else fails, we rely on who did the most. Quantity is IMPORTANT but it's the least important of all three.

Basically, think of the PPVs as the beginning of a new chapter of the ongoing FTUW Storyline. And treat all the time between the PPVs as your own STORYLINE. Feel free, at ANY TIME, to generate more heat for your upcoming match. Use your own discretion on whether your new Heat Post should be put into an already existing thread or a new one.

It bears repeating: FTUW Heat stresses quality over quantity. Don't just post one vapid promo every few days and think that that cuts it. We would much prefer one INSPIRED performance leading up to a PPV, joined by a few relatively minor retorts to your opponent (we want to see BACK-AND-FORTH SEGMENTS). Obviously, players who post NOTHING leading up to the PPV will almost INVARIABLY be jobbed the fuck out in a manner that may result in the complete annihilation of their wrestler (they'll have to make a new one). In this way, it is in some respects MANDATORY to at least cut a promo.

If your character dies from some reason and you DO NOT APPROVE (he probably only died because you were fucking SILENT, SHITHEAD), you can petition the booking team through the aforementioned means to plea with us to bring him back. Or, you could just make a new character free of charge and try not to be such a goddamn fuck-up this time.

New rules added specifically for Phase 2!

1. No ressurecting characters that died in Part 1 unless you have a really good reason. Tell the bookers what the reason is and we might consider it. We really want people to do NEW characters so that the old ones do not become STALE.

2. No using celebrities/historical characters unless consulting the booking team first. We don't want you to fuck with our shit, basically. Also, no using fictional characters from other universes. I guess you can CONVINCE us otherwise, but basically we'd rather you make up your own guy or, in special situations, turn a celebrity into a bizarre, bloodthirsty demon.

3. No using other people's characters (dead, living, or otherwise), creating relatives of other people's characters, or whatever AS YOUR OWN CHARACTER unless consulting the original creator and then the booker. This is different than the rule for promos where you can use another person's character or their uncle or something as long as you have the original creator's permission.

And that is about all that needs saying, gentlemen. We hope you enjoy your spot on the roster of MOTHERFUCKING FTUW.

*The best way to contact the booking team is via Private Message*

The FTUW Booking Team:
Vinny
Triple Life
Spamdini
SuperPsaturn

The Other Heroes:
Yogurtman (Official Timeline Wrangler)
Big Fagot (Librarian of D'Lo Mythos)

Vinny · (Fri Jan 19, 2007 9:38 pm)

- Characters are not added until after their 1st match.
- The rankings now only reflect PPV wins since all that other shit was too hard to keep track of. And hey, it's Phase 2, so we might as well start over from the beginning!

THE ROSTER:

WRESTLER: THE ILLUSIONIST
PLAYER: Ace Kendo
RANK: 1
W/L RECORD: 1 - 1, .500
REASON: Won the Chariot Race! Yeah!
UPCOMING: Maybe something good if he keeps his goddamned mouth shut.

WRESTLER: LUNAR PLEXUS
PLAYER: Seru40
RANK: 2
W/L RECORD: 1 - 1, .500
REASON: Despite whipping tons of ass, he didn't win exactly! Sorry!
UPCOMING: Not being blue anymore.

WRESTLER: DEIMOS
PLAYER: Triple Life
RANK: 3
W/L RECORD: 1 - 1, .500
REASON: He almost in 3rd at the end of the race.
UPCOMING: Vengeance!

WRESTLER: THRAK
PLAYER: Rice
RANK: 4
W/L RECORD: 1 - 1, .500
REASON: Because of prehistoric wasps.
UPCOMING: The wheel.

WRESTLER: SUPER AGENT HARRY UNDERWOOD
PLAYER: Mautty
RANK: 5
W/L RECORD: 1 - 1, .500
REASON: Bears.
UPCOMING: Bears.

WRESTLER: NICK & AL SPARTA
PLAYER: Big Fagot
RANK: 6
W/L RECORD: 1 - 1, .500
REASON: Turned giant Thrak ball into extra-heavy giant Thrak ball.
UPCOMING: Victoly, I'm sure.

WRESTLER: KANZAKI KENJIRO
PLAYER: Vinny
RANK: 7
W/L RECORD: 0 - 1, .000
REASON: He got destroyed by Underwood and didn't make it to the Chariot Race.
UPCOMING: More revulsion.

WRESTLER: AXELROD WAYLYN
PLAYER: Magic Juan
RANK: 8
W/L RECORD: 0 - 1, .000
REASON: Come on, he was up against Seru.
UPCOMING: He'll battle a jobber and get the victory he deserves!

WRESTLER: GLORIOUS TITAN
PLAYER: The Great **Jon**
RANK: 9
W/L RECORD: 0 - 1, .000
REASON: He lost.
UPCOMING: Will he win?!

WRESTLER: DOOLITTLE
PLAYER: Space Ghost
RANK: 10
W/L RECORD: 0 - 1, .000
REASON: Can he make a comeback?!
UPCOMING: Probably.

WRESTLER: CORPORAL BODY
PLAYER: Username
RANK: 11
W/L RECORD: 0 - 1, .000
REASON: He lost because he didn't promo at all.
UPCOMING: Probably not getting promo'd for.

*** THE DEAD ***

WRESTLER: DWAYNE GUAN
PLAYER: Spamdini
RANK: N/A
W/L RECORD: 0 - 1, .000
REASON: He fucking sucked!
UPCOMING: Guan Fei is shedding a tear in heaven.

Yogurtman · (Mon Jan 22, 2007 3:56 pm)

I really like that the first new rule is:

1. No ressurecting characters that died in Part 1 unless you have a really good reason. Tell the bookers what the reason is and we might consider it. We really want people to do NEW characters and to let the old ones become STALE.

and yet Vinny is writing shit for Kenjiro. I mean, I know he didn't die, but come on.

Ryoko's Biatch · (Mon Jan 22, 2007 4:02 pm)

Vinny loves Gay Faggot Shit by Ace Kendo. Just let it go.

Yogurtman · (Mon Jan 22, 2007 4:05 pm)

I don't actually mind, but someone had to say that.

Vinny · (Mon Jan 22, 2007 7:37 pm)

Kenjiro never died.

Vinny · (Mon Jan 22, 2007 7:37 pm)

Some FTUW aficionado you are!

Yogurtman · (Mon Jan 22, 2007 7:38 pm)

Maybe you missed the part where I said, "I know he didn't die, but come on."

Vinny · (Mon Jan 22, 2007 7:44 pm)

Then I don't know what your point is! If it's about him getting stale, he was dumped after like 3 PPVs.

Yogurtman · (Mon Jan 22, 2007 7:45 pm)

I guess I don't have a point.

Action Hank · (Mon Jan 22, 2007 8:08 pm)

We all know what the point is.

Big Fagot · (Mon Jan 22, 2007 8:26 pm)

So how is this going to work? When does the CYCLE start?

Vinny · (Mon Jan 22, 2007 8:30 pm)

It WAS to start when we switched over to this board, but that's when it was supposed to be mid February.

So I don't know, I guess mid February!

Action Hank · (Mon Jan 22, 2007 8:45 pm)

It should start as soon as these awesome sidestories/intermissions are finished.

Magic Juan · (Mon Jan 22, 2007 11:11 pm)

Seriously, when can we fucking make wrestlers?

Yogurtman · (Mon Jan 22, 2007 11:17 pm)

Once the LEAGUE IN WHICH YOUR WRESTLERS ARE COMPETING is introduced.

And the world is explained enough that you can create a backstory that makes sense.

Magic Juan · (Mon Jan 22, 2007 11:28 pm)

I think you mean when all this mastubatory wanking is done!

But I'll wait.

Spamdini · (Mon Jan 22, 2007 11:48 pm)

Why didn't Kenjiro die when Japan was obliterated?

Vinny · (Tue Jan 23, 2007 12:05 am)

Because that was stupid and ridiculous. Fucking Handsomus R. Awesome blew up an island with his cum!

I love it when SuperPSaturn writes matches, but if you guys are going to take that shit literally I can't let him since he might have Theldorrin shove his dick in the GRAND CANYON and blow up the planet.

Yogurtman · (Tue Jan 23, 2007 12:28 am)

There was a chat you weren't in where everyone except me voted to have that match be canon.

As a compromise I think we decided it just blew a 20 mile crater and wiped out a lot of the population, but some people survived; it's just a shithole.

Or we could just pretend it never happened which is still the easiest method.