Dragon Ball Z Uncensored

[Theldorrin]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Woodlouse

Scroll down.
_________________
@}-,-'- *~*~* Member of the FTU Elegant Tea Party Society *~*~* -'-,-{@

[ALDP]

The bugs that I called potato bugs when I was in the business of asking what bugs are called are not ones that can roll into a ball. I'm no bug expert though. "Chuggypig" is one of the worst names I've ever seen for anything.
_________________
"Cogito ergo sum (I think therefore I am)" Plato



Clubs: Chums, FTU Non-Virgins, Secret Bad Company Club, Elite Boys [ReBoot]

[Servbot]

Roly-polies are fun to play with!

[ALDP]

Chuggypigs are fun to play with when they're a a nickname for your mom and "play with" is a euphemism for "fuck mercilessly"
_________________
"Cogito ergo sum (I think therefore I am)" Plato



Clubs: Chums, FTU Non-Virgins, Secret Bad Company Club, Elite Boys [ReBoot]

[Theldorrin]

These names are all regional. Except maybe pill bug.
_________________
@}-,-'- *~*~* Member of the FTU Elegant Tea Party Society *~*~* -'-,-{@

[YES]

IF regional is a euphumism for "theldorrin is gay" then i am in awe of your rational incite

[Vinny]

I just had one of the most vivid and horrifying hallucinations ever.

First off I was in a dead sleep having this incredibly lucid dream where I receive news that one of my long time friends had died in a car wreck. It was really bizarre because the dream took place over weeks and was firmly grounded in reality. Initially, I just ignored the fact that a friend died, felt increasingly guilty about not talking to his wife since the death, and ended with having an emotional breakdown right after he was buried.

However, when I woke up I saw a series of things that weren't grounded in reality. Still half-asleep, I look down the hallway and see a massive figure approaching in a urgent limp like it was giant guy who got shot in the leg and was fleeing from something. Now, I'm going to try and explain how my hallucinations work. Since I'm "awake", my brain tries to interpret what I'm seeing. The conscious side immediately creates an answer and the subconscious side that's creating this illusion feeds off of it and, on the fly, transforms what I I'm seeing MORE INTO what I think I'm seeing.

So I think I'm seeing John Goodman in a poorly-made bear costume lumbering towards me. Like, he's wearing patches of bear costume and his face is sticking out of the bear's maw yet, I somehow intrinsically know that he's trying to FOOL ME into thinking he's a bear.

Anyway, I recognize my hallucinations as hallucinations all the time and just wait for them to PLAY OUT and my brain to wake fully up, but this was so VIVID that I'm wasn't sure despite how preposterous it was. My hallucinations rarely move very far since they're usually me misinterpreting a shadow or some clothing into something else. The fact that this particular hallucination is coming towards me and making some ground made it seem all the more realistic. I figure "Well, once the hallucination reaches my bedroom door it'll be so close that I'll be able to see that it's not real, whatever the fuck it is."

This doesn't happen, instead BEAR JOHN GOODMAN GOES FUCKING NUTS AND STARTS THRASHING HIS BODY INTO THE WALL. Almost NEVER do I have hallucinations make noise and if they do it's whispered talking. I'M SHITTING MYSELF NOW and I think I HAVE to DEFUSE THIS SITUATION, so I TELL BEAR JOHN GOODMAN "I KNOW YOU'RE NOT A BEAR" but I'm in such a half-asleep state it comes out as mumbled, delirious muttering (it is) as I desperately try to sit up. My logic is that if I identify John Goodman as John Goodman, he'll be embarrassed and stop destroying my house.

But instead the hallucination starts SCREAMING "I'M A BEAR! I'M A BEAR!" as if to CONVINCE ME, yet he sounds nothing like a bear and everything like an engraged John Goodman. Now, as he's ALMOST TO THE DOOR, because of the angle he vanishes behind the corner briefly. I think "OK, if he's a hallucination, he might vanish completely now since he's no longer in my field of vision." INSTEAD, he teleports closer several feet and his head tilts from behind the corner and he slowly gazes at me (my brain likely conjured this up because I thought "Oh God, I hope [what I just described] doesn't happen, that would be very creepy."

I'm blinking constantly and staring harder to try and SEE WELL ENOUGH so I realize that John Goodman cannot possibly be standing there in a tattered bear outfit. I believe that to end this I have to LOOK AWAY and IGNORE HIM. I look over to my computer desk and see this terrified man pinned behind my computer desk, somehow getting stuck after climbing through my window (I intrinsically know this, but how else would he get in anyway so it's fairly logical assumption). I COMPLETELY BELIEVE that THIS ISN'T A HALLUCINATION and suddenly get furious at this intrusion at someone much smaller than me. The guy looks completely terror stricken and is begging me for help, which again his voice is much clearer than any other hallucination I've experienced. I now think he CAME INTO ROB ME so I stand up, mutter something incomprehensible and vaguely threatening, charge over, and PUNCH THE HALLUCINATION'S HEAD which in reality is a WALL. The pain immediately wakes me up, and all this monstrous shit that was pouring out of my brain vanishes completely.

I'm looking over at the door now and my door had been closed the entire time. I was so out of my fucking mind a white door looked like my hallway and my kitchen with John Goodman stomping through it.
_________________

[Ryoko's Biatch]

As hilarious as that all is, your mental condition is clearly deteriorating at a rapid pace and you should probably, I don't know, do something about that before you end up in Gay News for murdering someone in your sleep.

[Vinny]

Now that I have health insurance I might get some prescription sleeping pills.

This was sort of a rare event, however. I've been mentally pretty fine for awhile now.
_________________

[BigJoeMex]

I'M A BEAR! I'M A BEAR!

[BigJoeMex]

Are you okay now, buddy?

[Servbot]

I blame alcohol. Even if you didn't have a drink the night before.

[Vinny]

Alcohol is what keeps these demons at bay.
_________________

[My Head Hurts 90]

Vinny's power is far beyond mine.....

[Derek Payne]

I also got health insurance recently, Vinny. However, they've pretty much claimed everything as a preexisting condition so I'm still paying for everything out of pocket.

[Magic Juan]

That is the most insane thing I have ever read!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Theldorrin]

I'm glad I don't have to worry about getting health insurance. I think they'd probably look at me and doubt that I was actually alive.
_________________
@}-,-'- *~*~* Member of the FTU Elegant Tea Party Society *~*~* -'-,-{@

[Fagzilla]

I'm waiting for OBAMACARE!

[Fagzilla]

I'M A BEAR! I'M A BEAR!

[Action Hank]

. . .

Vinny's post made me happier than I rightfully should ever be after reading about someone's insane hallucinations. . . but HOLY SHIT YES!