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Tactical Legal Action
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Ryoko's Biatch
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 9255
(Sun Oct 07, 2007 3:58 pm)
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Post     Re: Tactical Legal Action

Joseph Bruce McCarthy extends his hand. "So, do you understand what you are now? Are you ready to fulfill our father's dream?"

The cold burns the pieces of bone in the Black Judge's mouth.

A look of concern crosses McCarthy's face. "John? This isn't a request. We're going to fucking kill the shit out of this planet." His face quickly changes to fury. "Goddamn it, John."

John Baines McGuinness pushes the bones in his jaw together.

"Fuck you."

"Well, then." McCarthy rips his black leather gloves off. "Let's fucking murder each other."

Before he can react, a knee snaps McCarthy's head back and then a headbutt tosses him down into the snow. The Black Judge violently pulls him to his feet by the hair and then tosses him into the elevator, denting the steel door with the shape of McCarthy's face.

"I've been waiting for this pain," McCarthy says, blood streaking down his forehead. "Come on! IS THAT ALL YOU'VE GOT?"

He stands up straight while John Baines shoulderblocks him back into the door and then viciously knees him in the gut over and over. McCarthy coughs up blood between his grinning teeth. Then he elbows his brother in the spine, lowering the Black Judge's head between his legs. THEN A POWERBOMB CRATERS THE GROUND, SNOW RISING INTO THE AIR LIKE A MUSHROOM CLOUD.

"GET UP! I'M NOT DONE YET!"

An ax kick lands on the Black Judge's sternum and then an elbow drop across his throat. Unable to breathe, he's helpless when McCarthy lifts him into the air by the neck with one hand. With a single slap, the Judge is sent spinning and then slides on the ice before hitting and shattering a tree to splinters.

"In the end, this is all you had. It's embarrassing that Roosevelt wanted to give you my place in the Seven." McCarthy runs up and kicks the Black Judge in the face, sending him straight up and falling into a sleeper hold. "Well, brother, any last words before I break your fucking neck?"

"Ergh ... D-do ... y- ... Do you have any dickfors?"

"What's a dick for? FUCK!"

MCCARTHY IS SHOCKED OUT OF THE SLEEPER HOLD AND THEN THE BLACK FUCKING JUDGE SPIN KICKS HIM IN THE RIBS, SENDING MCCARTHY FLYING. WHEN HE TRIES TO GET TO HIS FEET, AN ARM WRAPS AROUND HIS FACE AND HE'S BULLDOGGED INTO THE ELEVATOR, EXPLODING THE STRUCTURE AND LEAVING A HUNDRED FOOT DEEP HOLE IN THE EARTH.

The Black Judge cracks his knuckles and then pops his neck. He casually walks up to McCarthy's prone body and then steps on his ankle, snapping it. The Judge looks up toward the knee and then steps down again, breaking the kneecap. Horror crosses McCarthy's face as a fist falls at nearly sonic speed into his FUCKING NUTS.

"FUCK! Goddamn, John ... I didn't think you had it in you. I guess it's time to die." McCarthy smiles and then pushes himself up with one hand, using his momentum to kick the Judge in his face. When McCarthy hits the ground again, he sees that his brother hasn't budged. "Murderfuck?"

The Black Judge lifts McCarthy into the air with a chokehold and then dangles him above the elevator shaft. "No."

"Well, then this will actually hurt."

A knife pops out of McCarthy's shoe and is kicked into the Judge's gut, making him lose his grip. McCarthy falls, but holds onto his brother's wrist like so many Hans Grubers, pulling the Judge down onto his chest over the hole. McCarthy lets out a slight laugh.

"You're coming with me. I'll never let go."

John Baines McGuinness manages to grit his teeth.

"Good."

AND THEN HE FUCKING BITES HIS ARM OFF AT THE SHOULDER.
Vinny
[00:10] How can you get an erect dick into your own ass?
Joined: 16 Jan 2007
Posts: 5181
(Sun Oct 07, 2007 5:15 pm)
Reply

Post     Re: Tactical Legal Action

YAAAAAAAAAA!

You should've put up a picture for McHarris' other son, though.
Vinny
[00:10] How can you get an erect dick into your own ass?
Joined: 16 Jan 2007
Posts: 5181
(Sun Oct 07, 2007 5:16 pm)
Reply

Post     Re: Tactical Legal Action

Voiced by Cam Clarke, obviously.
Ryoko's Biatch
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 9255
(Sun Oct 07, 2007 5:22 pm)
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Post     Re: Tactical Legal Action

EPILOGUE

"Tyson brought the surviving brother to us, sir," Archibald Orwellington says, standing over the unconscious John Baines McGuinness. "He was suffering from massive blood loss, but we managed to stop the bleeding. The new arm was successfully attached."

"The God Hand ..." Theldorrin whispers to himself.

"Excuse me?"

"It has the power to defeat a god."

The Secret Prime Minister steps back in shock. "Why would you give him such a powerful weapon?"

"It's all part of my plan." A red glow becomes apparent through the bandages wrapped around Theldorrin's face. "Besides, he's the only man who could wield it aside from its original owner."

"I see." The Secret Prime minister pauses. "And what plan is that? You believe that 'the Black Judge' will destroy what's left of America?"

"I'm not creating wild cards." Theldorrin walks toward a window and watches hundreds of slaves building a massive structure. "No, his purpose will become apparent soon. You're witnessing the cultivation of something grand and my garden will soon bear fruit."

"You couldn't possibly mean ..."

"Drop McGuinness on the outskirts of Booker T. Washington, D.C. And tell Tyson that he's earned his membership." Theldorrin snaps his fingers and the doors to the room open. "I'll call upon you when your services are once again required."

"Y-yes, sir."
Vinny
[00:10] How can you get an erect dick into your own ass?
Joined: 16 Jan 2007
Posts: 5181
(Sun Oct 07, 2007 5:25 pm)
Reply

Post     Re: Tactical Legal Action

OH SHIT.
Action Hank
Yes, I fart dicks. Dicks actually come out of my anus when I fart.
Joined: 20 Jan 2007
Posts: 8600
(Sun Oct 07, 2007 9:10 pm)
Reply

Post     Re: Tactical Legal Action

This is pretty awesome.



Too bad it's too late!
Ryoko's Biatch
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 9255
(Sun Oct 07, 2007 9:17 pm)
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Post     Re: Tactical Legal Action

No shit, fag. I just wanted to finish the fucking story before the PPV.

Go suck more dicks.
Big Fagot
Alpha ape
Joined: 09 Jan 2007
Posts: 10544
(Sun Oct 07, 2007 9:18 pm)
Reply

Post     Re: Tactical Legal Action

Triple Life, much of this storyline is not admissible.
Ryoko's Biatch
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 9255
(Sun Oct 07, 2007 9:19 pm)
Reply

Post     Re: Tactical Legal Action

That's what your mom said about my dick because it is too big.
Vinny
[00:10] How can you get an erect dick into your own ass?
Joined: 16 Jan 2007
Posts: 5181
(Sun Oct 07, 2007 9:20 pm)
Reply

Post     Re: Tactical Legal Action

I didn't notice anything glaringly wrong.
Big Fagot
Alpha ape
Joined: 09 Jan 2007
Posts: 10544
(Sun Oct 07, 2007 9:26 pm)
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Post     Re: Tactical Legal Action

What's wrong is this faggot is trying to cheat and post promos after the deadline!

Heh! "Nuh uh, mister!"
Rice
Joined: 20 Jan 2007
Posts: 3470
(Sun Oct 07, 2007 10:01 pm)
Reply

Post     Re: Tactical Legal Action

Shouldn't this just count towards his next PPV match?
Vinny
[00:10] How can you get an erect dick into your own ass?
Joined: 16 Jan 2007
Posts: 5181
(Sun Oct 07, 2007 10:03 pm)
Reply

Post     Re: Tactical Legal Action

It does.
Action Hank
Yes, I fart dicks. Dicks actually come out of my anus when I fart.
Joined: 20 Jan 2007
Posts: 8600
(Sun Oct 07, 2007 10:04 pm)
Reply

Post     Re: Tactical Legal Action

Yes.
Bladtman
Joined: 14 Feb 2007
Posts: 614
(Wed Jul 02, 2008 12:52 am)
Reply

Post     Re: Tactical Legal Action

so uh why was I mentioned in this?
Ryoko's Biatch
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 9255
(Wed Jul 02, 2008 1:06 am)
Reply

Post     Re: Tactical Legal Action

The joke is that various characters are voiced by human beings that we are acquainted with.
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